Friday, April 8, 2016

Favorites

The favorite child.  This is a hard thought to have but if you have siblings it has come into your mind at some point.  Who is the favorite child?  I am an only child so I have an interesting point of view on the subject. It seems that half of the psychologists out there say the first child is the favorite. The other half say the youngest is the favorite. But they all seem to agree that the middle child pulled the short straw in life.  Sorry middle kids.  It’s hard for adults to admit whether or not they actually have a favorite, but I think they do.  I don’t believe it has anything to do with age or birth order.  It has to do with a connection and if you can connect with your child then they will most likely be your favorite.  It’s not a question of loving one child more than another.  The love is equal but feelings are not.  
If a mother and father have a daughter and a son and the son is constantly defying them and ignoring his parents while the daughter listens and respects her parents then the daughter would most likely be the favorite.  This also works vice versa.  This is not based on sex.  The daughter could be the rebel while the son is the angel.  
The best thing to do is to just be yourself no matter if you are your parents favorite or not. Just know that they love you no matter what and that it's okay to not perfectly connect with your parents.  Not everyone does and that is just a part of individuality.  
If you are having some sort of crisis after reading this just sit back and breathe.  I have had a million crises thinking over these types of things.  See earlier in this post I lied to you.  I am not an only child; I have a half-sister who is twenty-nine.  I am seventeen so we were never really raised together.  There was a huge family shunning thing so there was a six-year gap where I never saw or talked to her.  So I was raised as an only child with the knowledge stored in the back of my mind that I actually had a sibling.  Weird right?  So my mother considered me her favorite because I was her only child and my father considered me his favorite because he was mad at my sister.  
Now I know what you are all thinking “Wow she must have been so spoiled”.  And to that all I have to say is… Nah I'm actually pretty chill.  I’ve never really felt like the favorite, more like the only.  I guess that changes my perspective on the whole sibling dynamic.  I really don’t understand how people can fight tooth and nail with their sibling yet still turn around and say they love them.  I guess I'm too literal for that kind of family dynamic.  If I don’t like you as a person then I sure as hell won’t say I love you.  I don’t care if you are family or not.  I can say right now that I have family that I would never say I love you too.  Now I'm not saying I wouldn’t pull them out of the path of a speeding car but I wouldn’t give up my firstborn for them.  I guess it’s all about perspective and how you were raised.
I have a thousand more opinions and stories featuring my family so if you guys want to see more of that or want to hear the full story about my half-sister then give me a comment and let me know!


Love,
Carrie

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